Sunday, January 18, 2015

How To Beat the Blues When You're On The Ranch and You've Got Nothing But Yer Spouse to Entertain You

Every once in a while I go through what I call the "Blues". I didn't have the blues so much in the city because there was so much distraction there. I guess what I'd have in the city was more like depression because I'd get so overwhelmed with my situation. And I was angry a lot of the time. The city can just make a person angry. It can be as little a thing as stop and go traffic when you're late for a meeting, someone cutting you off, drivers driving too fast and performing unsafe lane changes, or being married to the wrong guy. You know, little things like that.

Out here there's no such thing. Quoting the famous joke line "I lost 180 pounds when I left the city" (this was in the form of the ex-spouse).  I gained back 210 pounds in a much, much better partner in my guy who I call The Cowboy. He saved my arse and I'm worlds better for it. Unfortunately I also lost my edge in being able to handle freeway traffic. To a degree. When I have to go into the city now I find that I must be hyper vigilant. More than I used to be. I guess I was used to craziness before and now I'm used to quietness.  So what's so bad about that I ask you?

So what I have now are The Blues. Especially on days like today when there's nothing going on except the same old, same old and the sky is gray. I spoke to my sister who knows what I'm talking about. We share the same DNA and upbringing so our reactions to stuff in our environment is very similar. We bolster each other. She says,  "Wait a minute. I thought I had the market cornered on being screwed up! That's my claim to fame and you can't have it. ha ha ha ha. You don't want to know what goes on in MY head!"

She's so great. I'm lucky to have her. When we were kids we didn't give a fig for each other but you know how getting older changes things and I'm lucky things did change. Well, anyway since I was thinking about how I was down I decided to put some thoughts on paper. Maybe as a way to make a change. To feel better. I thought you might find some good in it, too.

The number one thing about getting blue is not to resist it and beat yourself up about it. As a matter of fact it's super OK to wallow in it a bit. IMHO. Invite that demon to tea! Say, hey, buster, ya wanna have a cozy little get-together? I find that doing that takes the edge off right away. OK, now we're in the Joan Rivers frame of mind "Can we talk?" which means the stage is set for a new outlook.

Turn all the lights on in the house! If there's any possibility of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) that's the first step to putting that nasty bugger down. And put on your favorite music! Play it as loud as your spouse/partner can stand it. Maybe play it louder than they like. (But when they complain make sure you do turn it down!)

Above all don't turn to food to make you feel better because I guarantee that you will feel WORSE than you did before you indulged. We don't want that, now do we? However, if you do turn to food make sure it is something unbelievably delicious. Something special. None of this eating whatever is there and feeling bloated, gorged and miserable. Bloated, gorged and miserable from half-assed food is the worst kind. If you're going to be bloated , gorged and miserable it better be for a good reason like what you ate was outstanding. So that's my view on comfort food. Maybe I talked you out of it. Hopefully.

Then the last thing is make plans. If you haven't started a journal of Enticing Projects That I'd Like To Do Someday start it now. What we're going for is this: the future looks bright, I have to wear shades, today won't last and a new day will dawn that is so much more fun. Yes, this, too, shall pass.

If all this fails run for the life boat in the form of the pickup truck or SUV. Get the heck out of Dodge. Have lunch at the local constabulary where there might be a fire in the wood stove and smiling faces greeting you and showing you to a table. Linger a bit. Have that extra cup of joe. Sink into the noise and vitality of the cafe. Shoot the shit with the owner or waitress. Maybe even the folks at the next table if they're of a mind. Just don't go over to the in laws. They might be as down as you. Don't go to the in laws unless you know you will pull each other up and out of where you are. There's nothing more of a downer than a pity party 3 miles up the road.

Whoa, I feel better already! Thanks for listening!


  1. I giggled reading this one...
    Is it ok for a masculine, grown, beardbearing man to giggle?? Ahh... screw it.. ;)

    I know exactly what it's like.... except for the sister (brother/friend/whatever) part and I dearly miss a café in these parts.
    Thanks for making me smile... and giggle. Feeling better too!

    1. Really? Thanks Ron! Mission accomplished then. There's so much in this life to feel down about. And it's hard to take a break from that sometimes. I'm glad my words helped you feel better. I think we need more levity in this serious world. To help us cope with the tough stuff. Have a wonderful day!